Posted in Categorize Me!

Window to the (online) past

On my way home today, I heard a song that reminded me of my very first childhood crush. And I wondered, what ever happened to him? So when I got home, I looked him up on facebook and lo and behold…he was there! I looked at his 4 profile pictures and was able to use context clues to discern:

  • he either is married or has a baby mama
  • he has a son
  • he has a tattoo on his forearm
  • he has pretty good skin

The last time I saw him, he was dating a friend of mine (small small world, since he started dating her when I hadn’t seen him in almost 10 years or so)–they broke up and my friend tried to hook me up with him at a high school dance. I vaguely remember talking to him on the phone—excited at the prospect of possibly hooking up with the first guy I had the hugest crush on — and he was talking like a gangsta’ which immediately turned me off. I came up with some excuse as to why I couldn’t go to the dance and never heard from him again. Well, I couldn’t help myself and sent him a message asking if this was the same guy I knew from childhood and I hoped he was doing well and he looked happy. And I am sincerely happy that he looks happy. After that, I couldn’t stop myself. I looked up the girl who lived across the street from me. Looks like she has 6 kids! DAMN. Alhough, she had 4 brothers and sisters so I wasn’t too too surprised. I also messaged her saying a friendly hello and sorry that I didn’t keep in touch when we went to different high schools. My last memory of her is of a letter she left on my doorstep asking why we didn’t hang out anymore. Frankly, it was because I was in eleventy billion clubs and hanging out with my high school friends and didn’t have time for neighborhood friends. Alas. She was the girl who introduced me to Super Mario Brothers (the first in the neighborhood to have a Nintendo! I was so jealous) and to Garbage Pail Kids (she had ALL of them. I only had like 2. And it was like duplicates of the 2. I wonder what ever happened to my Garbage Pail Kids now that I think of it). It was like eating cheesecake—couldn’t stop at one slice. I looked up two exes (I’m still friends with almost all of them, except these two. Mostly because I moved away and didn’t develop friendships like I did with the others). The first one was MIA. Nothing. Nada. I wondered if he stayed in New York or if he moved somewhere else. What kind of job he has. What happened to his dad and if he ended up with the girl he dumped me for. I decided to look up one more ex and he wasn’t on facebook but he has his own website. Looks like he did get married to the girl he dumped me for (I wasn’t surprised. It was one of those scenarios where he had a girl best friend and I guess she decided she was in love with him when he started dating me…and wrote this long ass letter about how she should be with him and not me. DRAMA!) and is still doing something creative, but interestingly, not as impressive as the people I have met after him. His work was…ok. My coworker would blow him out of the water if I’m going to be completely blunt. Anyway, that was enough. I had binged enough on past friends and made me reflect on the friends I DID keep in touch with. Anybody I considered a BFF, I still keep in touch with today (with the exception of one, but she was two-faced), anybody I got along with as a roommate, I still keep in touch with. So, in all, I still felt I had a pretty good track record. One of my friends, who I kept in touch with, like every 5 years, is now part of my book club! What are the chances we would end up living in the same city at the same time. I also thought about how much I’ve changed and how much I stayed the same and hope I kept all the good bits and shed all the bad bits. Probably not all bad bits, but I think I’m a better person. Maybe a little more snobby but a lot more laid back. I think. But I prefer my life this way, some people from the past that I took a little peek at and went on my way. I was tempted to look up people I dislike and hoped they were bald and/or fat but decided that was too much cheesecake for one sitting.

Posted in Storytime

Why is the bunny trying to kill itself?

No problem. I’m a slow ass.

So my schedule is pretty jam packed. I get up typically at 6am because I either have chiropractor appointment, a nutritionist appointment, a haircut, a car appointment, I try to take my dog to day care sometimes or a swim class. Sometimes I have to go to work early for a shoot. Yesterday, I slept in (with the intention of going to spin class or a bike ride) to sweet sweet time of 8am…and thought, I’ll just do biking after work, the days are lasting longer. I get out of work and get home around 645pm. Sun is still out. Take out the dogs and then sit on my butt for like 15 minutes to not think about anything for 15 minutes…because I like to do that sometimes.

I dressed up in my biking gear and propped my bike on my bike rack. Then I went back home and sat on my butt again thinking about nothing again. Finally, at 730pm, decided to go on my bike ride (I did all those preemptive things so I wouldn’t talk myself out of the bike ride). 40 minute bike ride is scheduled. I did a 120 minute bike ride on Saturday and my @ss was still hurting from that ride so I was like ‘greeeeeaaat”.

Do you get a great butt from biking even though you’re just sitting the entire time? I hope so. Anyway, it was getting dark and I had taken off the blinking lights off my bike (I had all this commuter stuff on my bike and my training mentor was like “take all that crap off. It’s weighing you down”) and now I can’t see a damn thing. As I was riding (the W&OD trail for peeps who are curious), this deer bounds out! And then 3 more deer bound out. The first thing I thought was LYME DISEASE! AHHH. Then I thought, good thing I didn’t die and run them over…am I supposed to speed up or is that just in a car?

But, as I pass the crossing where the deer where bounding out, there was like 80 of them there! Whaaaat. I continue riding, getting darker still and it starts to sprinkle. Well, great. Then bugs start hitting my face (turns out, we were in the beginning stages of a thunderstorm) then as I’m starting to gain speed, this RABBIT bounds out last minute. I mean, dude, couldn’t you bound out like 5 minutes before? Must you wait for me till I’m about 2 seconds from hitting you? I turn around (as I hit my 20 minute mark) and the same damn bunny bounds out AGAIN and runs back to the side it originated from. Dude. I finish my bike ride without roadkill and without eating a bug. I cross off my workout from my calendar. Success.

Only 5 more weeks to go.

Posted in Nonsensical, Storytime

How I ended up doing a triathalon

Before I can write about how I got involved with doing the triathalon with Team in Training, I have to mention how I got involved with Team in Training in the first place. I joined my very first event with TNT in 2010. Jen, my childhood girlfriend (since the 5th grade) had never been to DC and we were planning a roadtrip in mid-April 2010. In late March, I got a mysterious message from her that she couldn’t make it because she was “sick”. I thought that was unusual to back out because of illness; I mean would you let a cold lead you to cancel your flight?

Two days later, she wrote to me (she was too scared to call me because she said she would burst into tears) and said that she was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. She was somewhat positive because there was a 95% chance of survival. I, of course, freaked out and said “What about the other 5%?!?!” Feeling helpless, I checked the mail and received a flyer to join a team for the Lymphoma and Leukemia Society. I hemmed and hawed at it until I had dinner the next night. I met with friends for dinner and one of them, Julie, and I, got along extremely well. She ended up driving me home that night and she started talking to me about her daughter, Ryan Marie. Ryan Marie had passed away from Leukemia when she was 3 years old. This year, she would’ve been 8 years old. So I went to the info session, had my fears qualmed by a woman named Dania, and thought it was extremely coincidental that I would know one person who was diagnosed with Lymphoma and another who passed away from Leukemia. So I signed up. Subsequently, I did two more events with the marathon team and would always look at the triathalon team and think, “there is NO way I’m doing a triathalon”…until last year. My cousin sends me a message last April, telling me that she had just been diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. What are the chances that I would know 3 people with a blood cancer? Anyway, she was terrified of going to chemo and I don’t know what happened, but I started saying that I would do something, in honor of her, that terrified me. So of course, silly me, I said I would do a triathalon. I would do an event for each of my honored teammates and indirectly go through a scary journey (not comparable to cancer but its something, right?) “with them”. Let me tell you, I wanted to give up the first week we started. The first time I swam at the rec center, I couldn’t make it to the other end of the pool. (Apparently, dog paddling doesn’t count). My first bike ride, I was out of breath after 15 minutes. I have the sad commuter bike that I bike with my running shoes…I’m too intimidated to get those crazy clip in shoes. It took me 45 minutes to figure out how to use my bike rack. I have a sensitivity to chlorine. I was tired all time and regretting not having a social life anymore. But the reason I didn’t give up was always different. One week, when I’m feeling down, Julie would facebook me. Another week, Jender (5th grade friend) would call me to visit. My cousin’s sister (also my cousin) would send me a donation. I would swim 500 meters. I would do my first brick. My mentor Ali would talk me out of it. I would read a touching story from our Mission Mentor (those emails really work for somebody like me, who always wants to give up) and each thing would come at a time where I was ready to send TNT an email that I wanted to quit. I mean, isn’t raising money enough? Well, now its too late. I gave up Diet Coke. I gave up alcohol. I gave up fried food. (until the triathalon anyway). I’ve lost almost 30 pounds since January, I can bike 100 minutes and then run for 20 minutes afterward. I swam a mile for the first time ever today. I ran a half marathon 2 weeks ago and improved my time by 15 minutes. I can kick my boyfriend’s ass on the bike and on a run, even though his legs are twice as long as mine. (He can’t even keep up anymore!) So anyway, I am hardly an athlete and I’m still overweight but I feel if I could finish this damned race, I can do almost anything. I feel I should write a better ending to this post, but I can’t think of anything cool. Blargh. How about: well, if you want to support me, please donate to my cause. I am almost 80% there! http://pages.teamintraining.org/nca/anttry12/smayof

In honor of Ryan Marie