Month: May 2005

was there no doubt that i would win the bowling deathmatch?

people have been asking me if i won or not and i say “just look at my competitor’s face, and you’ll know who won…” hehe.

actually, it was a lot more dramatic then i anticipated and our scores were a lot closer than i wanted.

basically, if i was doing good, my competitor would say “don’t talk to me.” whereas when I was doing bad, i would say “i forfeit. you win, i give up.” but instead of trying to take my forfeit, my competitor got me drunk.

but you know what? i still won bitches.

i’m going to bed now. i had more to say but i forgot already.

and i’m in the middle of an x-files marathon. i wished that the more x-files episodes i watched, the faster my metabolism would go.

i also wish i was a metabolism scientist and invent a cheesecake that sped up my metabolism.

just you wait, world, just you wait.

So I have this coworker, his name is Bob.

Bob has a mail order bride from the Philippines.

I am Filipina. Hence, he thinks he has this automatic bond with me because his mail order bride, the woman he can start fucking as long as he keeps up the payments is Filipina.

Oh, and i get teased about it in the office. They call him my boyfriend. That he is my lover. This and that. I can’t take it anymore. None of you can possibly understand the turmoil I am subjected to.

“Hey Sharon, there’s a tornado in the Philippines”
“Hey Sharon, take this quiz and find out how filipino you really are!”
“Hey Sharon, check out my screensaver, it’s on this beach in the Philippines”
“Who are you chatting with?” [I’m chatting with my sister] “Oh, is she in the Philippines?”

NO YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE. JUST BECAUSE I’M FILIPINA DOES NOT MEAN I AM OBSESSED WITH BEING FILIPINO.

Oh and it doesn’t help that everyone thinks it’s funny and on top of the incessant filipino talk, that I get teased about it. It WOULD be funny if there were like 8 filipinos in this office and we can all share our filipino horror stories. But there is JUST ME!! would he be doing this to me if i was a filipino guy???

I think i should just fuck the shit out of him and get it over with. Afterwards, I will kill myself with disgust. I will lie on the office floor and have a note stapled to my face “I am filipino and I am fucked”

Yeah, I don’t know what that is.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

man, my life is pretty goddamned boring.

i watched 3 movies today…by myself cause none of my friends here really like watching movies. man, that kind of blows.

one of the movies i watched [and when i ordered my ticket the woman was like “one?” “yes, one, sheesh. how many of me are there?”] was called Mindhunters. Basically, I watched it because a) i was bored and b) i like serial killer movies.

when i was driving home, i was thinking…man, i should be a serial killer. I mean, who would REALLY suspect me? I’m nice, i’m asian, and i have bad eyesight. oh and i’m clumsy. nobody would ever suspect me. I think my method would be extrangulation [or bloodletting]..you know what that is? draining all the blood out of the body. yummy. i would come up with some fucked up ways to kill people.

i’ve decided, i want to be evil.

i want to be nina meyers evil. if you don’t watch 24….she’s the chick who became second in command of CTU and FUCKED everyone…including jack…and killed his wife. She fucking smart as hell and a ruthless killer.

all ruthless killers are guys. i want one where it’s a girl who uses her prowess [i have no sexual prowess so it would be ‘innocence’ prowess or ‘i’m ditzy and clumsy’ prowess] to kill everyone who ever crossed her.

yeah, that would be great.

i’m thinking of giving up film all together. i can’t write. i can’t direct. i don’t know why nyu thought i had any talent….did they think i had money? what were they thinking?

i’m thinking of bailing out of my current career and going back to school for my masters. i think i want to be a professor. i like teaching and i like intellectual conversations with people.

i’m looking into it. i want to go to oxford in london. i’m thinking, if i get in, i’m leaving massachusetts and moving to england. i’m thinking of chasing the film dream, i should’ve stayed in pre-med and kept it as a passionate hobby.

i wish more of my MA friends liked watching film. i get sad sometimes watching it by myself.

i sent out a big ass mass email to give everyone my new address. it was very exciting.

i’ll do this while i’ll listen to my new ben folds cd/dvd in 5.1 dolby stereo!!!

A – age : 26
B – band listening to right now : Ben Folds
C – crush : Ron Livingston
D – dad’s name : Arnie
E – easiest person to talk to : Christine
F – favorite band at the moment : Ben Folds and his…bandmates
G – gummy bears or gummy worms : Gummy worms
H – hometown : San Diego
I – instruments: huh? piano.
K – kids: are mental.
L – longest car ride ever: from san diego to massachusetts
M – mom’s name : Josephine
N – number of siblings : 2, a sister and a brother
O – one wish : to be as evil and smart as Nina Meyers in 24…but I kill jack and get away with it.
P – phobia[s] : commitment. sorry.
Q – favorite quote : “i wasn’t kissing him, i was telling him a secret in his mouth”
R – reason to smile : i will not have to worry about going bald.
S – song you sang last : Time by ben folds
T – time you wake up : 1030am…but today, at noon.
U – unknown fact about me : my teachers thought i was a remedial learner, put me in a remedial class and i blew everyone away when i actually did talk [because i knew everything]…but i rarely talked until i was 16. go figure, now you can’t shut me up.
V – vegetable you hate : ummm. the one with chlorophyl
W – worst habit(s) you’ve had : smoking. i quit
X – x-rays you’ve had : my knee
Y – yummy food : stuffed mushrooms!
Z – zodiac sign : cancer

oh yeah, i quit smoking.

ode to my cigarette:

goodbye cigarettes
it’s been good times, but not to
my aveoli

so what’s the difference between friends that f*&k and a casual sex relationship?

is there a difference?

i only ask because i was having a discussion about this with a friend and i was like “there’s a difference?”

i guess so.

man, it was hard to get into work today as I was in the midst of an x-files marathon. better yet, i was watching an episode with Bruce Campbell! [known mostly for being in Sam Raimi films…see Spiderman and Evil Dead 2].

I have to say, I’m feeling a lot better. No holidays coming up for a while [YAY!] oh wait, there’s memorial day. dammit. there’s a bunch of films coming out that i want to see [yes, my thirst for watching films is coming back, slowly]. better yet, i’m starting to watch movies by myself again. i got so used to feeling like i needed company, but i’m getting used to being by myself all the time again.

this is good, i feel.

i got a new haircut and dye job. I am now a redhead. I also like this as well because it was like i was cutting off some bad memories. mmm. bad memories go away.

speaking of memories, as I have moved into a new apartment, i was emptying out some boxes. in one of the boxes, i found the following:

*two valentines cards that were unsigned [i had primarily bought them to give them to whomever i was dating at the time]
*a ticket to a baseball game
*a ticket to a dave attel show
*a barf bag
*a suncoast gift card
*a stewie doll

there were more things but i’ll stop it there. you see, when i’m out with friends, if i had a really good time, i keep a memento from that day. i don’t really tell people about it because i don’t want to be teased [like sometimes, i’ll steal a sugar packet or something]. my intention is that i’ll make a scrapbook. I start one in every state..but i don’t show to anybody..it’s for my eyes only.

anyway, so i find this box of mementos that i started saving last year…but this box was different. it was a bunch of mementos from people who had made me cry and so i threw a bunch of the crap in the box [i have a big box, and i filtered through them and took out the offending items that reminded me of particular people] and threw it in this littler box. while i was tempted to throw it out…i didn’t. i just threw it in a suitcase i never used and completely forgot about it.

so i’m looking at these and i start laughing and remembering some memories that i totally had forgotten about. i had some really good times with these people. my thing is, when i have a falling out with people, i completely focus on the negative and try to shut them out…and i forget about the good times i ever had with them.

the best part about stumbling about in this box, is that i didn’t feel hurt anymore. or sad. i mean, i don’t hang out with these people anymore nor am i that close either but…it was nice to know that i once was very close to them and i had people i would come to in times of trouble.

now, i suppose this is how random phone calls to friends [or exes, depending on your poison] get made. you run into something that reminds you of them and then you call. i’m not strong enough or ballsy enough to do that [because, i suppose i’m scared of getting hurt again] but maybe one day i will. who knows.

i put the stewie figure back in my cube though and gave a call to one of my friends to see if this person wanted to have a meal. so, that’s something i guess.

anyway, enough of the sentimental crap. here’s something i stumbled upon as well. might as well do it. i only have eleventy billion more hours at work…

Thirteen random things you like:

1. postcards
2. weird horoscope books
3. road trips
4. drummers
5. baseball games
6. walking in a new city
7. lotion [i’m not too picky]..i like to feel moisturized
8. duh, sex
9. watching the sun set
10. independent single people
11. unorthodox away messages on IM
12. the mythology of the phoenix
13. comfortable shoes

Twelve movies you can watch over and over:

1. glory
2. old school
3. the usual suspects
4. sideways
5. when harry met sally
6. sneakers
7. seven
8. you can count on me
9. eternal sunshine of the spotless mind
10. 12 angry men
11. the shawshank redemption
12. bridget jones’ diary [1 & 2…c’mon, they go hand in hand]

Eleven bands/artists that rock:

1. ben folds
2. garbage
3. modest mouse
4. red hot chili peppers
5. the decemberists
6. outkast
7. fountains of wayne
8. no doubt [yes, i’m a whore]
9. NERD [rip guys 😦 ]
10. semisonic
11. queen

Ten things about you … physically:

1. red hair
2. boring brown eyes [with contacts]
3. short in MA, tall in CA [5’5 or something like that]
4. short fingernails
5. big boobs [sigh]
6. nice toes! [sigh]
7. not very hairy [as in, pretty hairless i guess]
8. straight teeth
9. tiny ears
10. um….good complexion i guess? [don’t confuse that with acne free. i get acne once every few months i guess]

Nine things you wear daily:

1. jeans
2. sweatshirt
3. bra
4. comfortable panties
5. contacts
6. toe socks
7. toe ring
8. my….smile i guess?
9. man, i’m running out of things…um…sneakers but i love flip flops for the warmer weather
10. dude, that’s it. oh, eyeliner!

Eight favorite foods/drinks:

1. chicken [any style]
2. diet coke
3. amaretto sours
4. newcastle [hard to find in MA for some reason]
5. key lime pie
6. cheesecake
7. shrimp
8. stuffed mushrooms. oh god, that is heaven.
9. Seven good friends: [listing MA only here]
10. john
11. mike
12. steve
13. wheats
14. lisa
15. samantha
16. joe

[christine, you know i would add you here, but you are not MA, you’re RI!]

Six things that annoy you:

1. people who make plans with you then cancel. number one pet peeve. i get so mad.
2. vegetables and their stupid cholorphyll taunting me.
3. bad breath. dude, gum was invented for a reason.
4. when in an argument, twisting it so you always look like the good guy. man, can’t you just say sorry to each other and be over with it?
5. not returning text messages or phone calls within 24 hours.
6. ummm….know-it-alls.

Five things you touch everyday:

1. um, duh, myself [take that response however you like]
2. my hair
3. my dvd player
4. my computer keyboard
5. my contacts

Four shows you watch:

1. Monk
2. 24
3. Sex and the City
4. South Park

Three celebrities you have a crush on:

1. Ryan Reynolds [see Amityville Horror]
2. Bronson Arroyo
3. Ron Livingston [oh god help me]

Two things that make you cry:

1. When you make 10 phone calls to hang out with friends and nobody responds. [that hurts a LOT. has happened a bunch].
2. When somebody makes me feel stupid…

One person you could spend the rest of your life with:

1. I’ll keep that one to myself.