Posted in Categorize Me!

I like the word snafu

My feet are killing me. Just did a 8 1/2 hour shift at Starbucks. You coffee-addicts need to slow it down. There’s enough heroin for everyone.

I decide to start up a review site. I’m calling it “Sharon’s reviews” where people named Sharon review other people named Sharon.

The requirements to get a review:

  1. you must be named Sharon
  2. you must have glasses and/or contacts.
  3. your last name must be named after a condiment.

Introducing my first review! This spiffy girl named anniewaits18:

navigation: 10/10 (interesting yet surprising)

spank your knee hilarity: 10/10

is it a make-out template?: yes 10/10

you want to read more content?: yes 100/70…you write some good shit bitch.

Overall score: 130/100

Sharon, you have the best diary ever. Good job. I will read you forever, love, sharon.

Operation Hotness update:

got the contacts. Everyone thinks I look GREAT but I think my face has too much surface area. It’s like, woah, people, stop looking at my eyes. However, the comments I’ve gotten:

stacey: oh my god! you have cheekbones! and you have perfect skin! oh my god! you’re hot! screw the glasses!

cari (co-worker): you can see your pretty eyes now

okay, yuck I’m tired of compliments. so here’s a negative one:

jasmine’s (my sister) friend: you look fine but I prefer the glasses. I’m just a glasses guy.

so SEE there!

as in with the diet. I lost 10 pounds but holy mounds of meat, there are only so much meat you can eat before your teeth says “sheet, why so much meat?” so I think I’m going to go off of atkins for a while and stare, I mean, watch what I eat (for about 5 mintues) and then eat.

I am getting my hair dyed my natural hair color tonight (gasp!)

I quit smoking (gasp gasp gasp)

and I’m have a dentist appointment to fix my teeth (i have a cavity. damnit) and a pap smear and a flu shot and and and…I forget what else.

I no longer work out though cause I’m always working with my full time and part time job. Dude, I better have cash coming out my ears this coming december.

speaking of december, my old roommate, nyc/nyu best friend emailed me and asked to move with her in brooklyn for 500 a month. AHHHHH! Why do people want me so? (i kid, people, I kid)

Oh, I went out drinking with my girl Gina. She’s a quarter of a century old. I was pretty drunk and she took some pictures.

You wanna see?

Too bad.

Dude, I drank 2 beers that night (that’s how long I HAVEN’T had alcohol,my tolerance becomes virtually nothing) and i paid 18.00. That’s 9 bucks a beer.

This beer better provide me some sex or wash my dishes for being some damned expensive.

Okay, I’m going now.

Oh, I saw Runaway Jury last night. Good flick. A touch predictable but John Cusack will look 25 forever and that’s hella hot. Hackman and Hoffman? How could you go wrong? Hoffman’s and Ritter’s son went to my college.

their names were ben and jason. but they were on the 3rd floor. damn drama students.


Legitimate movie reviews, Illegitimate blog from a legitimate American. 2 Legit 2 Quit. Hey Hey.

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